amanda

i seem to constantly be going back into the 'archives' when it comes to these posts,

but i can't help but identify so strongly with these women & their thoughts that i read about

2 or 3 years ago.

moreover, i think i'm finding that i must stop thinking about incorporating their philosophies into my life, and actually start acting on them. physical healing has to be accompanied by emotional healing, otherwise theres absolutely no point.

anyway, onto lady amanda harlech.

 

 

what i loved so much about her ITG feature,

and what has resonated with me so much over the years,

is her philosophy on self-care, and self-love.

 

i feel like these things have been written about and discussed to death, but it's so much harder to actually act on these philosophies, and incorporate them into your life (your thoughts, the way you treat yourself and others)

 

on to the radical quotes.

 

For me, beauty is grace. So, it’s not just how somebody looks in a photograph. It’s much more about a woman in motion. It’s the life that I find really beautiful.

 

 

So, my beauty philosophy is really to look after yourself. There’s really nothing immoral about that. Looking after myself is giving myself time. Time to breathe. Time to sit still. Time to look at the sky. Time is very important.

 

 

Beauty, it’s just very caring. It’s not about looking in the mirror and thinking, ‘I hate you! Transform you! Obliterate you! Disappear!’ It’s about saying: ‘This is me. You’re tired. You’ve got great bags under your eyes—that’s not surprising!’ So, don’t stop loving your skin. That’s all we are. We’re a heart pumping with a spirit somewhere and we’re a bunch of bones and skin.



pictures + words above from amanda's lovely feature on into the gloss

no.1

no. 1

 

 

smudged eye makeup & clean skin at vanessa seward, spring 2016

 

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chloé hq, paris

 

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a myriad of lipsticks

 

 

 

 



rebecca

 

 

 

in·sou·ci·ance/inˈso͞osēəns,ˌaNso͞oˈsyäNs/

noun a relaxed and calm state : a feeling of not worrying about anything; lighthearted unconcern     'I’d say I’m French in my approach to beauty: I’m easy-going. Of course, I love to dress up. Who doesn’t?  But a year ago, I got really scared of all the toxic things that are in beauty products. I mean, I smoke, I drink, I’m not a vegan, I eat like a French person, so pretty healthy, but with ice cream and candy.'   - rebecca dayan, on beauty      lately i've been feeling a bit anxious - about my health, work . . life in general. the second i feel like something has fallen into place, it seems to magically fall apart not long after. i remembered this article from into the gloss that i read many years ago, and it reminded me of the attitude that i admire so much. this attitude of insousiance. even her body language exudes nonchalance. it's the complete opposite of how i'm feeling at the moment - generally worried about everything in my life. how i long to relax and feel at ease! but as many people who have been through chronic illnesses will tell you, it's difficult. . sometimes it feels impossible.



naturel

hello there.

 

today i'm feeling inspired by the makeup at chloé's

spring/summer 2016 show; smudged eyeliner + curled lashes, natural puckered lips,

brushed up, undone eyebrows.

 

& a quote that has resonated with me lately.

as a teenager, i was always on the outsides of certain cliques.
whether i was in or out depended almost entirely on the whims of my
classmates. i was the one with acne and glasses, and i felt like i was
at their mercy. i felt uncool. i never felt quite good enough to stand on my own
two feet, and own who and what i was.
in short, i trained myself to feel ashamed of who i was.

it's funny how my high school mentality has stayed with me into my late twenties.
i still feel like that uncool kid, the one who tried way too hard, the one who
wanted other peoples approval.

i find myself, even now, trying too hard to sound interesting when talking to people.
i talk too much, too fast. i say things that, in retrospect, i shouldn't have.
it's a culmination of years & years of conditioning myself to believe that
i'm not pretty, therefore no one likes me and no one will listen to me.
i talk too much because i feel like the other person will quickly tire of me
and stop listening. like their interest will wane, and they will agree with the masses:
yes, she is uncool, she's not worth the attention.

i try and tell myself, now, that i am a different person. my skin has
cleared up, the glasses are gone. but that 'i have acne, i am hideous' mentality
has never quite escaped me. in a way, i hope this blog can help me
recapture that essence of who i am, & the style and aura i have always
wanted to radiate, but never quite figured out how.

but most of all, i hope this process will help to remind me that the only
person i need to impress is myself. the only person whose opinion matters
 is my own.

so if that means holding my tongue when i'm way too excited to say something
(inevitably i will stumble over my words) then so be it.
if you don't say something funny or smart, it doesn't mean that you are neither.
it's an attitude of calmness that i need to instill in myself.
an attitude that says: you don't need to impress anyone.
you are enough.



 

malgosia

 

have you ever paid attention to someone when they gossip or

speak harshly about someone?

their faces change . .their entire aura changes.

 

one thing i've learnt is that if i'm feeling horrible about myself

(and trust me, when you have on-going health issues, this happens fairly

routinely. .), i take it out on others: mostly in the form of gossip / complaining

about people and (unknowingly) feeling sorry for myself in the process.

 

this reminds me of an article i read about  malgosia bela, in which she talks

about the same phenomenon:

 

The older I get, the more I feel like myself. It’s like I don’t have to pretend anymore. I have a child and a family, and every year I become more comfortable with my own face, body, and character. I think that actually shows on your face. Even people who are very beautiful, but are jealous and mean, have this kind of grimace on their face all of the time, or they will say something ugly and the charm is gone. 

 

this is so true. and i think gossip and general meanness reveals more

about you than you'd like. things like insecurities and low self esteem.

that's not to say that i could realistically be positive all of the time, a little complaining

is healthy, especially if you're in a stressful situation, but it does remind me to

ask myself which part of me is hurting, which part of me is angry, before

i lash out.

 

if that sounds like too much work . . well, yes. it probably is a lot of work.

but the alternative is not examining your life, and not acknowledging your

fears and insecurities.

 

i reckon its worth the effort.

 

 



mystical

i've always been a fan of cosmic, mystical imagery

(hence the name of this blog, non?).

there's a dream-like quality about crescent moons, stars, midnight blue,

steel grey, silver, black, pale violet & little things that sparkle.

 

the above image of solange knowles probably doesn't register

with any of the above to some of you. but to me, the quality of the photo

(kudos, solange), the blurriness of the image is very dreamy, very mystical.

i also love her black polish & dark, mysterious eyes.

 

 

in my makeup collection, i have an eye shadow by laura mercier.

it's called 'deep night' & it's a beautiful deep blue-grey colour.

i long to use it across my upper and lower lash line, to create a bit of

smokey look, a bit enigmatic. how pretty would that look,

finished off with two coats of black mascara?

 

 

file under: makeup goals.

rediscovery

 

 

 

 

when i mention the word rediscovery, i don't mean to reinvent.

that would mean rejected all that i've experienced & all that i've learnt in this process.

it might mean that i've been embarrassed or ashamed of who i used to be.

 

but i realize that i can't be who i want to be unless i embrace the person i used to be.

 

for me, in my journey, i want to be able to learn from my past experiences.

to learn why i acted in certain ways, what i was afraid of, and how i treated myself.

what i am inspired by, and aspire to be, hasn't changed much over the years. what has

changed is my willingness to ask myself difficult questions, examine the why's behind

my mentality, and be unabashedly, brutally honest with myself about my internal dialogue.

 

and the answers, really, come down to this:

self love & confidence

 

i had neither as a teenager and in my mid 20s. and it pigeon holed me into a space where

i questioned everything . .  and risked nothing. i would constantly tell myself that once
i had achieved x i would do y, never quite realizing how unimportant my pursuit of x was.